Getting my ass covered...

Being a big guy doesn't help much when i go out shopping for clothes. I don't fit into any of the outfits I'd like to buy and I'm usually stuck with what the particular shop has in my size, take it or leave it, 9/10 its take it even if I don't like it much. I've also noticed that since very few shops carry my sizes they usually mark their prices very high because they know their potential victim won't go home without having done any shopping, at any price.

I figured out the internet would be a good place to shop for oversized clothes, since there should be plenty more big guys out there. So I tried ebay, and discovered that some good fashion houses do the large thing. My first venture was a complete disaster though, I went for 2 Paul & Shark Bretagne sweaters, one cream and one black, both size 3xl. After waiting three bloody weeks for them to get here from Germany by DHL (!), i found they perfectly fit my younger brother who wears a size M. I hate italian sizes, I think they make their clothes so small to economise on the fabric. So there I was, two splendid sweaters I couldn't wear unless i went on a Gandhi diet for two years.

I decided to play safer, and I went for German shirts next. I never bought german shirts before, but i figured that Eterna shirts should be a good quality make since the name sounded so cool - Eterna - as in Mum proof shirts. My mum is distinctly capable of ruining my shirts as she ignores washing and drying instructions completely. Her best friend is my dog, who has refined tastes and exclusively prefers to chew up high street label clothes. I got the shirts along with a small packet of Gummi Baren by Haribo. Nice touch I must say. But to my horror I had bought one of the shirts with extra long arm length. I guess it will fit a fat Buffon clone easily but alas not me.

Ok so till now i had two really small sweaters, 2 good shirts and one three musketeer shirt I'll never wear... I needed trousers now... So I thought Levi's jeans and Dockers pants were cool. Back to ebay, I made best offers for a pair of jeans and two pairs of flat front trousers. They all got accepted. I waited more than two weeks and decided to contact the seller. They informed me that it took 14 days to process the order. I own up, I contacted them after 11 days not two weeks, but what the heck ?, my ass was getting cold waiting... Finally got them, after another 3 weeks, the pants were ok, the jeans were the right size but the wrong fit...

Then it was the shoes' turn. I have always loved shoes, though I haven't been gifted with the most gracious feet ever. I am flat footed and my feet look like large cactus leaves. But at least my size is regarded as normal and that makes me happy. When everything you wear is regarded as oversize and abnormal, it feels good to order something normal once in a while. While on a day trip to Gozo I bought a pair of skechers boat shoes. I liked them immediately and they had a bargain price. So I got them. Only to have my girlfriend tell me that brown shoes didn't match my black Eterna shirt...damn... Then i bought two pairs of Nike trainers. One was a nice white trainer which gave me mega blisters after i decided it was the best to use for my 5km walk on my gym's threadmill (vain baby vain...), the other is a red leather ronaldinho 10 synthetic turf football boot, when i can't kick a ball and i hate Ronaldinho...

Please people. stop expecting fashion miracles from me, I give up...

Carboot sales browsing...and...Groizer X

Seeing it was a truly marvellous day, I decided to visit the carboot sale in Birgu last Sunday. It had been a while since I last visited a carboot sale, I must say I had gone cold turkey from my addiction to these sunday morning meets a few years ago, when I used to wake up at 5 in the morning to be one of the first 'sharks' looking for dubious treasure among the rummage put up for sale by the people setting up shop there.

The first few carboot sales were unique in a way, ebay was still in its infancy, and wi-fi unheard of. Therefore people used to put everything on sale without having a look at what this or that item was going for on ebay, and you could really snap a bargain every now and then. The scene is very different today. No one collects stuff for the sake of collecting anymore, everyone looks for stuff that has been seen getting high prices on ebay. Therefore we have seen a metamorphosis in the collector's person. He or she has become a hoarder, and collects to speculate, rather than to relish the enjoyment of a childhood memory or to fill an empty space in an otherwise empty space in his or her home.

Obviously enough, the prices at carboot sales have increased, because each time you try and get a bargain, the seller pulls out the ebay story, saying he has seen the particular item go for twice the price he's asking for the other day on everyone's favorite auction site. You might even find yourself with tears in your eyes faced by the seller's good heart on offering it at a much better, almost charitable price...

I am no more innocent than these same people though, I have tried my luck at car boot selling a couple of times, and have always returned home amazed at how all the non hoping items in my lot sold, while the potential sellers did not. People buy all sorts of things. I have seen loads of women buying second hand clothes for their kids at these places while holding a cigarette in one richly jewelled hand and an expensive mobile phone in the other.

So there I was, looking for a bargain. Which lot after lot, couldn't just cry out to me. I was tempted when I saw a box full of 'Shoot !' annuals from the eighties, but then lo and behold, finally, a handsome small piece of japanese gokhin. Actually I was a bit surprised. It was the small version of Nakajima's Groizer X in great condition though obviously lacking the little yellow missile, no big deal. The surprise factor was that it was... Groizer X. People my age have loved a plethora of Japanese robots, most notably Goldrake, Mazinga, Daitarn 3, Jeeg and Daltanious but Groizer X is an almost obscure figure in Malta. maybe that explains the good condition, the once little owner of this figure was busier playing with his Goldrake toys. The seller went through the normal routine of explaining that the item was very rare and hence the price. He asked for 20 euro, I offered 8 and then we settled for 15. No problems there, I had to have it, and left the place in a really happy sunny mood... Au revoir till the next...